If you'd asked me if I had anything approaching expectations of quality when I first started drunkenly watching NBC's Nashville Star 10 minutes ago, I would have laughed. Ridiculous, as I expect nothing but total and utter boring, derivative shit. How could Nashville Star actually disappoint someone who expected so very little from it? Well, brothers and sisters, I can report that this show actually fails to meet even the most modest expectations of televised entertainment. The look on Jewel's face as she tries to mentor these slithering aspiring fameballs says it all. "JESUS," it seems to say, "How have you managed to get yourself in a position to have a multi-platinum musician who despite her book of cheerleader-depth poetry actually was somewhat interesting in some way at a point in time not all that long ago (me) despite your utter lack of performing or vocal skills? Like FOR REALZ." And I would, just this once, have to agree with Jewel's face.
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