hey i was having trouble thinking today

so i wrote this:

FART STICKS AROUND POO TOWN

(POO TOWN) – Pootians were flabberghasted Tuesday by a fart stick spill on Stinkway #2, the town’s main thoroughfare (for poop). “It just boggles the [asshole] that a trusted fart stick delivery driver could be so careless,” said Squishy Stinktonian, a lifelong Pootian. “What is my son, Hard Gas, going to eat for lunch now?”